Mine and Bones's birthdays are either side of the weekend so we decide to go to a "classy" restaurant in Oxford that Laz recommends. (Lesley comes too... bah! She wears a hat that Perce says makes her look like Freddie Parrot Face Davis.)
As usual Laz's recommendation is wrong and the place is like a transport cafe for dstudents AND we have to queue for a table which Laz insists is a sign of class. Eventually we get a table, order a bottle of "Vin blank" each and an enjoyable evening is had.
*
The Norman Knight beat the Labour Club 7-2 and we spens most of the second half trying to set Laz up for a goal as it's his last game before he leaves for Cyprus again.
Unfortunately he is so crap that he even manages to blaze a penalty over the bar.
*
Nigel Lawson has scrapped Life Assurance Premium Relief which means we will now be snowed under as everyone tries to take out policies while they can still get it.
Worse still he has added VAT on takeaways!
*
We have arranged a school re-union at Rivers for Laz's going away do and we are expecting me, Perce, Laz, Bones (with bloody Lesley) Rob D, Wellsie, Spice, Simon H, Pete C, Martin B and Geoff W.
By eleven it is just me, Perce, Laz,, Bones (with bloody Lesley) and Rob. Maybe the others realised Fridays was Jazz Funk night and stayed away.
We have a good night anyway but can't dance because the black jazz funkers are far too cool.
*
We have one last surprise party for Laz before he fucks off and we hold it at my brothers.
The whole point of a surprise party is that the guests get there before the person whose surprise it is so when I convince Laz he can't leave without saying goodbye to Rob he looks extremely underwhelmed when my family, Rob D, Bones and bloody bLesley leap up and shout, "Surprise!" half heartedly.
The rest turn up after the pubs shut but Rob abandons the party when the noise wakes his kids up.
As I leave I am alleged to have walked into the wall and asked, "Where's the fucking door gone?"
*
Go out with Laz, Prockie, Symsie and Joff on a pub crawl of Wallingford for Laz's second from last night.
Prockie thinks it's hilarious that I'm the mug who Laz managed to sell his Cortina 1600E to for £400. He offers me his cigarette lighter for £300.
*
Laz spends his last night in Wallingford playing Clegg up the Knight. After closing I drivbe him to his sisters in my new car which is his old car. We shake hands and I wish him all the best and he says, "Be carseful in fourth gear 'cos it sometimes slips out."
And with this touching speech Laz departs. | 